What's Old in Singapore?

Dear Readers,

I'm getting ready to return to the States for three weeks over Easter. Before I go, I needed to take care of some things and get some engagements out of the way.

First of all, I was booked on the Sultan Tour which included a tour with the women of the American Association of the oldest surviving section of Singapore. This was the area where Lord Raffles first landed to see what he could get for the British and away from the Dutch. He found a Malaysian tribe living in houses along the beach eeking out a living as fishermen and pirates. At the same time, the first born son of the sultan (of Johor who ruled the area) had been kicked off the throne by his younger brother. His head had a price on it so he came to Raffles and said-make me Sultan of Singapore. Sure, Raffles said, just deed the property to us and we will keep the money coming. So he did and the rest was history. We tour the oldest sections of streets allowed to remain as long as they are kept up. Beach street now was where the water was before they recovered the land and expanded the island (Just two blocks over). The sultan built a mosque for the family and the people. Eventually, the British got tired of the sultans and ran them back to Malaysia. The king of the pirates then asked for the title-in return for hassling all ships not belonging to the British. Good Deal. The pirates built a home for their new Sultan and there they loved until just recently when the government threw them out. I understand that 300 people were living in the compound. The home is now a museum.

We toured the mosque-run by a Muslim convert from Indiana, USA. Naturally he spoke perfect English! Because he was American. I understand he converted from Catholicism. Anyway, we saw where they pray five times a day, where women are excluded upstairs, and the pray carpets provided by the Saudi family. They sell compasses for people who need to know where Mecca is everywhere in the world. Around the blocks surrounding the church are shops selling the Muslim products no one wants to be without. There are perfumes without alcohol. Prayer rugs. Hats. Outfits for pilgrimage. Head scarves. After the mosque, we headed over to the Sultan's House and then walked to the Muslim cemetery where the sultans are buried. Here things have fallen on bad times. The grounds were swampy and jungle like. There were hundreds of markers-Muslims are buried in shrouds with the head touching the earth. A pointed monument tells you it's a male and a flat topped monument indicates a female. There are no names. The sultans are on a raised platform with gold material tied to the monuments to indicate royolty. The guide told us that the cemetery was slated for destruction and a block of public housing is coming to be built over top.

If land isn't taken care, three letters go out, and then Bam, the land automatically falls to the government who builds on it.

The next day I took a taxi to the Raffles Town Club for the annual American fashion show. Here the members model clothes of various shops and mostly their tailor friends. Some models were skinny and some were real women-250 lbs worth. Not everyone looks good in a wrap dress or tube dress. I especially was fond of the lady with the Harley Davis tattoo on her back. Seems she rode a hog back in the States.

The big news I learned at the show was that you can spin bamboo fibers and make clothes out of them. Bamboo is so versatile-you can put it in soup, feed it to pandas, and go fishing with it. Now you can wear it.

The chocolate panels up at the hotel are almost finished. The chiefs from Taiwan, China, and other places were flow in to do the carving. I have been eating samples from the work at the desk there in a jar. They know Tammy on sight. "You again?" they ask. Unfortunately the hot tub at the hotel has been broke for months now and we are ticked. We really liked soaking up there after a hard day of touring, fashion shows, and chocolate eating. The easter delights have sold out!

Well, got to go. They upped my suitcase limit to 70 lbs. I can pack more it now! See you. May the Easter bunny bring you calorie free treats and good weather.

What's new in Singapore?

Dear Readers,

I know it has been a while since I last wrote. I have been struggling with stomach failure (gastroparesis) for a month now. For those who don't know what it's like, imagine you can't eat solid food because it doesn't digest. Instead, it sits in your stomach and rots causing pain and nausea. This goes on all day and night. While others are munching on hamburgers, you are sipping your Ensure and losing weight. So I went to the doctor here and started on a drug called domperdone, an old drug they used to use for morning sickness. It pushes food through the stomach and into the intestines at a faster rate than normal and controls naseau. It's like having an alien in your stomach. There are minimum side effect but the drug is illegal in the US because it causes birth defects. No worries there for me. Now that I am doing better, I am trying to get off it. We'll see if that is possible.

So, what else have I been doing? On our unending quest to finish all the things we want to do before we leave on August 25th, we headed over to Vivo City and caught the cable car rides to Sentosa Island and Mt. Fabor (highest peak in Singapore). More like a rock. While over at Sentosa, we had lunch at the newly opened Shangri La hotel there. Quite a place. Then we headed over to Mt. Fabor for a great view of the harbor, the ships, cruise ships, and tropical rainforest on the mountain. It began to rain so we headed back to the mall where they were having a wedding workshop. Steve took some pictures of the dresses in order to see if our daughters had any comment. Weddings here run $100,000 easy.

It's coming up on Easter here and it's the time of the chocolate duck in Sinagpore. At the Shangri La Hotel, however, not only can you get a chocolate duck but you can get a chocolate frog, mushroom, strawberry egg, two foot bunny, rooster, and my favorite-chocolate puzzles. You can even get a chocolate box with chocolate eggs inside. They have constructed a huge box with chocolate sides that the chiefs are carving. You crave a crunch bar just walking by. These guys have alot of talent-carving camels and tropical scenes all out of chocolate. What a country.

Recently we ventured over to the new Art Science Museum at Marina Bay, next to the casino. It was newly opened and they have alot of bugs to work out. First of all, they had eight counters and only one computer working. All the workers were gathered around the one computer watching the one girl work while the line was out the door. Steve was vivid. Then the audio was too difficult to even operate. It wouldn't slide (what happened to the good old days of buttons?) Steve was more vivid. However, I really enjoyed the exhibit on Genghis Khan and the trebachet (lobbing machine they used in ancient times to knock down walls). They had a little one that Steve and I played with-lobbing ping pong balls at one another. Then they had exhibits on the silk road with stuffed camels and such. Then there was the Oman ship wreck of 800AD off the Indonesian coast that had just beautiful and perfect china kept in barrells. It was marvelous to look out and imagine how after all this time, it was still in the perfect condition it was packed it back in 800 AD. Wow.

The design of this building is in the form of a lotus flower. It was fantastic. But they have a long way to go to make this museum work. For example, there wasn't any science. Just the hope that science was coming. They need to take some things from the art museum and some weird stuff they have in the national museum and stick it in there. And gets some science. They do alot of that here.

Last night I forgot I had signed up for a art lecture at the American club. It was at 6:30 and I remembered at 6:40. Oh no! I had already paid. So off I went in my Tshirt and shorts, running to the club. I got here about 7 and was ushered in to a room full of snooty art people dressed in ties and jackets and dresses. I felt pretty low and to make matters worse, the only seat left was up front. I decided to be a man and walked up there proud and sat down like I wasn't trailer trash. Like I had money to buy art. The lecture was excellent advice on how to start a collection and the guy from Sotheby's did a mock auction. That was fun. Afterwards, I sipped my free red cheap wine like I was one of them and acted like I knew what I was doing. But I learned my lesson. I got to start writing stuff down! My head is full of fluff!

Last Monday Steve and I had dinner with his boss's boss and some new people who have moved to Singapore on behalf of the company. They insisted we go to a Japanese restuarant. I had tempura shrimp and fried potato salad. No Kidding. Honestly, it was potato salad they had deep fried. Delicious. Never heard of that. Steve had soup with those shrimp with eyeballs swimming in it. To each their own.

I wanted to go to my bookclub at this lady's house so I took a taxi. Little did I know that the Chinese taxi driver knew less than me and I knew nothing. He drove up to Robertson Quay, the sign, at the Sinagpore River and said get out. I said this didn't look like an apartment building to me. So I got out and carried the address to about twenty people, all who gave me different directions to go in. Oops. Now a half an hour had passed, I was still at the river with a very black cloud over my head, and no closer to getting to the bookclub. A man at the back of an hotel saw me and motioned me over. I thought I sure do stick out like a sore thumb! Lost? You bet, sir. He had no idea either but he lead me inside the hotel (It had become white with a monsoon rain outside) and the man there ran me off a map. I tried and tried to call the lady whose apartment I was going to when I finally realized my phone was dead. Now what? I was long gone from where I was supposed to be and they were still pointing me in the wrong direction-according to the map they had just given me! A taxi drove up to the hotel and I jumped in. Home, James. I got home alive and dry. I called the lady from the apartment and she said no one had trouble-they had all taken taxis. Good for them. Wish they had picked me up as they seemed to know where they were going.

I learned my lesson. Make sure they know where you are trying to get to or all is lost before you even start. And make sure your phone is working. I had it fixed today! Tammy and I heading out to unknown territory tomorrow and I don't want to get stuck.

At night, Steve and I have been walking around the botantical gardens for exercise. We happened upon these cacti that people had been carving on. See, graffiti is a big offense. No one wanted to deface the park but I see they had no fear of attacking an innocent cacti that couldn't fight back. No one would dare to carve up a tree (planted by the Prime Minister himself!) I suppose the police traced the initials and caned the offenders. Or made them sit on cacti.

Well, the saddest thing has happened. My favorite store, This Fashion, is going bankrupt and closing. Seems they are in debt. This store was a brainstorm of some guy who copied run way designs, bought cheap fabrics and sent the designs to China for inexpensive knockoffs. He made a mint selling designer clothes at $20 a pop. I certainly have a very cool wardrobe because of him that I get all kinds of compliments on. They think I have gone to Mango or something where they sell a $10 blouse for $240. Oh well, times change. Soon I'll be back at Walmart and my usual sucky stock of clothes that I can afford. But for awhile, I lived like a queen . . .

The North Island of New Zealand

Dear Readers,

We were taken to a tiny airport outside Queentown about 9 o'clock in the morning and we took off in a small plane for the North Island. On the way, we flew over many mountains including Mt. Cook where there was a large glacier. Steve took pictures of the glacier which we couldn't see from the road when we drove by earlier.

We landed in Christchurch and were taken off the plane. Then they reloaded us about ten minutes later. Potty break! Then we took off there and headed for stinky town-I mean Rotorua. This was in Maori country-the land given to the natives because it was no use to the Europeans. The minute we walked off the plane, we smelled sulfur. Yes, the whole town was stinky! We smelled it everywhere we went-even in the hotel room. This was a place of geysers, mud pools, and steam rising from the ground. Here the old volcanoes are nearby-some still active. We had a huge geyser park right next to our hotel run by the Maori and could watch the geyser explode from our window.

The nice hotel we stayed in had a shuttle to the town center. This was where the restaurants were. So we headed out as soon as we got in and walked around the town center. We ate at the local dive-The Fat Dog. Here you get hamburgers with beets on them, butter maynonaise on my chicken. After that, we walked around the park and marveled at the mud pools and steam vents in the ground at the local park. Rotorua was known for its hot pools from the beginning. A huge mansion-hospital just like the Homestead in Virginia was built and people came from all over to take the cure. In the house we saw the mud baths they used to cure people back in the 1880's. We also saw a movie of a true event of a volcano eruption that blew up a whole Maori island just off the coast. The Maori were then brought to Rotorua where they had the last laugh-they run the tourist parks and even own the land today.

It was Valentine's Day and we decided to eat the buffett at the hotel. My stomach was going down so I had to be careful. We walked around the geysers after we ate and I was amazed at the mosquitoes that bit me after dark. I was that sweet!

The next day we caught the tour around town.On the bus were only Indian honeymoon couples. The driver was old and very cranky. The Indians were slow to get back to the bus. He yelled at them all the time. The air conditioner broke on the bus too. It got very hot and then everyone was hot!(irate) First we went to the geyser park where a native guide showed us teh mud pools and geyser we could see from our room. It erupted while we were there and that was cool. Then we went to the Agridome-where the same show shearing sheep was put on only on a much bigger scale. The man's dogs were hard to control and kept biting the sheep's ears. I wasn't impressed. Then we went to a wildlife park and got to see the Kiwi bird. They are noctural so they are kept in the dark during the day so people can watch them up and eating. I was very surprised at the size of this chicken like bird. It was the national bird but almost extinct. I understand the possums eat the eggs. Skin the possum! We saw alot of nice birds there. By then it was noon and the driver let us off at the town center. He was glad to see the end of the Indians.

After lunch, we walked to the museum where the senior citizens were playing croquet on the lawn. They also had a beautiful rose garden. The old hot pools are now part of the Polynesian Spa Building. If I had only had time!When we returned to the hotel, we went to a Maori tradtional dinner at the hotel. Most of the tour groups had left that morning so there was only about twenty people in the room. The show went on anyway. We sat with people from England. They were quite friendly and had been to Disneyworld three times! They liked Americans!

The next morning we left on a bus from Rotorua for an all day trip to Auckland, the capital and most modern and largest city on the North Island. Soon the stinky smell was gone and we were back out in the country. Here we saw huge cattle, sheep, and deer farms. Every once in a while I saw a llama, a pig, or some horses. We stopped at the Glow Worm Caves. Here was a typical Maori story. A Westerner and a Maori discovered the caves early on-the land belonged to a Maori family. The Maori decided to commercialize the caves and became very rich. Then the New Zealand government seized it for themselves and built new facilities. Then the Maori family descendants sued in recent times and got the caves back. The glow worms are mosquito like bugs who spend webs inside dark caves. The bugs are attracted to the glowing webs (like lightening bugs) and they worms suck their blood and make a cocoon. They hatch out, mate, and then die the same day. They aren't born even with a mouth when they hatch out. The cave was nice and then we got into a boat to float out of the cave. It was like a thousand stars at night inside the cave.

Then we got back on the bus and off we went to a lunch spot on the road. It was pouring rain by this time. Then we finally got to Auckland where a million people live. This was a modern skyscraper town just like Singapore but built on hills. We were in a hotel at the top of a hill. We walked down into town, rain gone, and looked around. We found a nice eating place, then walked around more. We found a store but it was closed that sold HUFFER T shirts. Steve had seen a man wearing such a shirt and asked if he was a Huffer. No, it was a line of T shirts designed for skateboarders. They were $100 a shirt! I never could figure out the significance of the name Huffer for these shirts. The gay designer is not named Huffer. I guess you have to be a skateboarder to get it. We were sad, however, that we couldn't find the shirt!So then we had to say goodbye to New Zealand and the next morning we took for Melbourne. Then from there, we flew back to Singapore. It was a long day but we were happy to get back. So there it is-our trip to the land under and the islands over.

Adventure in Queenstown

Dear Readers,

Queenstown is a hilly place. Our hotel was at the top of a steep climb and the town center below on a large lake. The lake was so big, I couldn't see the end of it. After arriving in late afternoon, we hoofed it downhill and ran into our friends on the train-Mike and Angie. We had already seen then along the road to Queenstown (they rented a car). This was their last stop before returning to Australia. They gave us advice on what to do and see when we headed to the North Island.

The town was filled with tourists. We booked a coal boat tour for the next day and found dinner at a nice restaurant. Then we hoofed it back to the hotel and walked around the lake for some pictures. The next day we went down the hill again and caught a bus tour on an authentic 1968 double decker bus from London. Not a single thing had been done to that bus! It was rough riding with no cushions on the seats. Our first stop was a winery outside of town. I tasted some wonderful pinot noir. They offered to ship the wine to Singapore for only $245 and then the cost of the wine. The bus driver was surprised that I would drink so early in the morning-no problem I said. Then we were off to the bungi jumping spot off a former railroad bridge. This was the exact spot I saw on Australian Biggest Loser where Jillian got a poor girl to jump to get over her fear. I watched a guy jump and that was enough for me. Then we were off to Arrowtown, a Chinese gold mining town of the past. We toured the old Chinese ruins where they lived in the 1860-1900's and mined gold. The Chinese are now part of New Zealanders. We did some shopping and then went by where speed boats were taking people on rides down the river. We were back in Queenstown by noon and found another American embassy to eat at-KFC. Then we walked up the hill to a glondola ride straight up the mountain overlooking the whole town. Here you could see the whole lake. They also ski up there. We ran into Mike and Angie again and they were going to ride a scooter down the track there. We watched them do that. Eventually we came down the hill and walked back to the hotel as a rain storm rolled in. Steve went back out and watched large waves crash into the dock. I was worried about our boat ride.

But the sun came out when it was time to go. We headed down to the dock where we got on a large coal ship. You could see the engine room through the glass and watch the fellow shovel coal into the fire. Cool. This boat was packed with a senior tour of drinking British talking people. They were drunk before we landed on the other side of the lake and and disembarked at a sheep station. Here we were ushered into a house turned restaurant where we enjoyed a great buffet.

After all that eating and wine, we were herded out to the barn for a sheep shearing demonstration. Now Steve and I are familiar with sheep shearing but not like this. This old man came with his dog and I wondered where the strong young guy was that was going to grab the sheep and shave it. This old guy, however, was so funny. I never laughed so much in my life. He opened the gate, grabbed a sheep, and dragged it out. He balanced it on its back where it couldn't move and said "Sit." It was just great. Instantly the sheep was naked. Next he led us outside where he demonstrated how his dog could round up the sheep without barking (better to steal the neighbor's sheep he said). Then he dismissed us to get back on the boat. On the boat we were given song sheets and we sang old songs all the way back across the dark lake. The drunken men sang the loudest.

The next morning we were off to Milford Sound to see the real fiords of New Zealand. We got on a full bus with a driver from hell. He dragged over the sharp mountains, pointed out the rockslides, and drove through the Homer tunnel. This tunnel was straight through the mountain, one lane only. There was a light that changed every fifteen minutes that allowed us to go through. By the way, we stopped at a pull off and there in the parking lot was a kea, a green parrot that was hell on wheels. He was on the top of this car and tearing up a guide book left on the hood page by page. Then he started on the windshield wipers. The owners tried to get him off the car by hitting him with the book. He then moved to the top of the car, reached his head into the slightly opened window and yanked out the seat belt. He was hit again and moved to the back radio antenna which he snapped off with his beak. At this point, the owner totally smacked him off the car. You don't miss with that bird. I understand that many a camper comes back to their car only to find that it has been pulled to pieces by this bird.

We arrived at Milford Sound around noon. Rain and fog had moved in. We were herded onto a large boat where a buffett lunch was served. We went around the sound looking at waterfalls and seals on a rock. Then we were herded back on the bus and drive like a bat out of hell home to Queenstown. The driver was determined to be back by five whether we died or not. Zoom. I never saw a bus take curves like that!

I was happy to be back in Queenstown alive! We got off downtown to look for somewhere to eat. There was this old church downtown and the restaurants had funny names around it-Heavenly Food, then Hell Pizza, Hellof a cup of Coffee Place. We chose the hell place and got some pizza with a couple of other people who were on our bus. Then we limped back to the hotel. We were flying out to the north island the next day so we said goodbye to the south island.